OK, I 'happened' to watch the show The Long Island Medium and it got me thinking about how I relate to my mom through dimes and my grandma through ones and my grandpa through butter. I somehow got online tonight and searched some links. Well one thing led to another and I learned that what I experienced the day before my mom's funeral when I felt paralyzed in the bed yet saw an apparition which I knew was her, is normal and is called sleep paralysis and can happen when someone has died. I was awake yet remember NOT being able to move my body as desperately as I wanted to. I was not scared of this apparition, but wanted to reach out yet my body was absolutely glued to the bed! I saw it/her walk in the room and walk by Maureen's dresser and by the window and wander around for awhile. The whole time being absolutely frozen in my body with only my eyes watching. I never researched this before, but bumped into it tonight and studies have been done on this! Then I figure I should try and understand all the weird 'travel' I did in my childhood. I VIVIDLY remember being scared...and I do mean SCARED to go to sleep at night. The reason being is that I knew I would be going for that 'ride' again. Now this ride was absolutely terrifying to me. Even though I enjoyed getting to the destination.
What it was, and this is how I always remember it before ever researching it and getting any other names for it so this is MY childhood description. I would be scared to fall asleep, inevitably, I would fall asleep and then the journey would begin. I would start racing in what was the fastest roller coaster ride ever. It would go on for quite some time and was absolutely terrifying to me. It would be in a tunnel. It was lightening speed fast. I would eventually arrive at my destination after this terrifying ride. The destination was pure peace and white. There would be a 'being' there. To say it was Jesus would be presuming too much. But there was a being and I remember pure peace and joy and just it was all white. Somehow the shape of the white being was differentiated from all the other white around it. I only remember it opening its arms for me and me being about 10' from it. These trips went on for months and months. This is why I remember it so vividly. It was NOT a one time deal. This happened every single night. I am certain I must have mentioned it to my mom. I was that terrified. I knew the end result was good, but goodness, it really was a scary trip and I felt like I was holding on for dear life! Now, of course I lived a life of abuse and lack of love. I wonder why I experienced this. And did I interact ever with this being and gain any knowledge or wisdom that I have put into my subconscious somewhere?
I have never told anyone this story till recently. It is THAT bizarre and how do you tell people you believe, somehow, you went to heaven. And not only once, but every night and that the ride there is terrifying!! Who on earth is going to believe you??!! Now I did put on my rosary one day I got for gr. 2 Communion and told the older grades at school that I had been to heaven that night. They all thought I was nuts. I swore Jesus had given it to me even though I knew my mom gave it to me. Did I think Jesus gave it to my mom?? I have no idea of all my thought processes and can only piece together the events I do recollect that are still vivid memories to me. Wow. So many weird experiences in my life. So much I have never talked about and so much I just passed off as not real.
Well, I have had SO many now and cannot pass them off as not real. I know that they are and were in fact real! Why is it that I have experienced so many different ones? The Spiritual Travel as they call it online...the Sleeping Paralysis while being visited by my mom...all the dimes...all the ones...my grandma coming back the night she died and the next day...the dream about Cory...the 8 months I spent talking with my mom...which I read about tonight as actually conversing with her and it was not a dream. I knew this intuitively, but read about the actual actuality of it happening. And how I 'spoke' with her nightly UNTIL I made the dime connection 8 months later. Then and this is yet something else I just learnt recently through Cory's last SEA Lisa, that I had had a 'Kundalini Awakening' upon putting the dime in the wine bottle that night. I had told her how I knew it was my mom sending me the dimes when that one night I put it in the wine bottle as normal and then BOOM, I had experienced a white light and an electric shock that threw me onto my bed. And with that was a complete certainty and knowing that these dimes were from my mom. I called Kevin immediately to tell him what happened as I was so happy. Somehow finding 4 dimes a week for 8 months wasn't explanation enough...or that I talked with her every night during that time.
Right after that, my dime finds went down to about 2/wk and I no longer spoke with her in my 'dreams'. It was like she was waiting for me to move on before she could move on. All this is all amazing to me and I only am recording it as it happened to me. I of course didn't even know other people found dimes until Sept. 2010 when a haphazard meeting with Marilyn at West Ed. (where I had found yet another dime) had her email me a blog about people who find dimes. And another sheet showing the significance of the number 10. I then eventually searched Facebook and found a Dime Finding group on there! I was SO blown away that there were others! I had no idea. I mean, I had met someone once at a mall and I found a dime and told her about it and she told me her husband finds dimes and was going to write a book about it and I was SO excited! I should have gotten his name. Just so many things we don't understand, that is for sure. But some things can't be proven with science. I know what I have experienced and gone through and they are nothing short of amazing and 'out of this world.'
No comments:
Post a Comment