Reflections

Friday, June 3, 2011 at 11:43pm
Upon reflection on our one year of no home ownership and simple living and traveling, I have learnt a few things. I had dreamed of owning nothing for years and just traveling. I also however, had an equally conflicting dream of having a homestead property and a large family and being self-reliant. Canning, pickling, fermenting, growing, etc. etc. To have two equally opposing dreams is quite challenging. In addition to that, I wanted to go to a 3rd world country to live. I always trusted however that ultimately God would decide my route. And boy has He!! I had one idea for our 1 year off, and He had another. Turned out to be a caregiving, helping time. Which, I have always wanted to do in my heart anyways and as challenging as it was, it was the MOST fulfilling thing to do. Helping my grandma and my aunt and my son and visiting many people and trying to bring people together for parties. When that was taken care of and we were on our way, all was good. Seeing new things is very exciting and awakens the senses.

Challenge is, especially with an ill child, that life still goes on in a very small space and is harder work than in a house. I was finding I wasn't enjoying the small space as much as I thought I would. I DID love meeting all the new people however. So many like-minded people were at Sam's where many people come for ailments and who just have open minds to alternative ways to live life. So many great conversations while hanging out in the hot tubs half naked. Loved the heat, the new smells, the views, the new sounds of the birds...but, after awhile, it all becomes routine and the daily tasks that are harder in a small space, take extra long to do. You think because you have less space, that you have more time...for some reason, this is not true. There was lots of time to reflect on wants and needs of the whole family. Which new directions to take. Always having Cory and the children as our #1 priority over any personal needs and desires.

Returning to Canada and exploring different areas for living. Do we go back to Edmonton near old friends and family? Do we try out the Okanagan? Do we go back to Grand Forks or some other small BC town? We said we wouldn't go back to the island....hmmmm...So here we sit. Back on the island. Determined to go somewhere new like Duncan or Courtenay/Comox spending days looking for houses, I happened across my post office manager who suggested Coombs. What??!! I never thought...so I find a house online and I just KNEW that was it...I felt something with it. I had seen hundreds online and they were all blah, blah, blah. No character, no charm, no calling. This one, with the alpaca neighbor, just felt right. I didn't think we would spend 9 mos. of our year off caregiving...but God had other ideas. I didn't think we would end after a year and buy a house right back where we came from...but it just feels right. I love my Naked Naturals, and the Art Gallery and my Quality Foods, Amrikkos East Indian, and the Thai restaurant with my favorite Phad Sauce dish, and Coombs, and the beach and the small town feel, and the library, and Cathedral Grove and Qualicum Beach and the friendly people and familiar faces and proximity to Tofino and Nanaimo and Courtenay, yet nestled away on our own land to create our own work in creative ways.

Close to Vancouver and Bellingham where new friends can be visited easily. I truly love the Island and I now have travel out of my system. I just want to get back to creating things, healing us sickies, with big dreams now of creating healthful-living retreats and growing most of our food. Who knows what the winter will bring and if we will just cosy up to one of our two fireplaces, or if we will fly off somewhere sunny for a part of it. All I know, is that as difficult as it sometimes was, it was equally rewarding and SO much was learnt and discovered in this year that helped to clarify the direction of my life now. This newfound focus and desire will help to create wonderful things. I will no longer have this dual-dream. You must choose a dream and DO IT!! Just DO IT! Only then can you create another dream...and another...and another! I learnt early on to take alot of free time to seemingly stare into space and do nothing. But this is when I am most productive. This is when I am dreaming and creating and fine-tuning and deciding the importance of goals in my life and which goals need precedence etc. My planning course in Rec. Admin. turned out to be one of the best I took. He taught me how to plan and how to ACT on the plan. That no plan is a plan without the last and most important step: ACTION!! He says this is where the majority of people fail. They get a goal and objectives and go through all that with a mission statement, but then...kaput. I am happy that I took that course in that he taught me to do the final step. To act on my dreams and to do what I want. It is only then can one achieve absolute and complete happiness.

I studied karate, traveled to Ireland to see birthplace of my grandfather, became a top selling travel agent and got to see Bahamas and Jamaica and the high end resorts there. Got every animal you can get, had 3 children, got married, bike toured extensively and soared down a mtn. pass at 75km/hr, saw the sunrise on Haleakala Crater, achieved honors and multiple grants and scholarships, achieved the highest mark ever given by the Dean of Recreation Administration for a research paper, got top sales as an insurance rep. in 3 categories, designed bike paths in Spruce Grove, volunteered for the sexual assault center, went to Quebec for 6 wks to learn french, learnt to sea kayak, learnt to rock climb, ran 2.5 hrs. straight just because, saved my mom's life because I took the time to take a first aid course, taught self defence and taught women empowerment and how to break boards, befriended immigrants and helped them integrate into society, laughed lots, met a couple soul-mates in my time, both female and male, sold everything I owned, risked everything many times, toured most of the US.

All this despite a life of being beaten, told I was stupid and worthless, and feeling completely rejected and unloved for pretty much the first 30 yrs. and losing my mom at a young age...probably THE toughest thing of all.. I think we all need to go through and do a list like this as it shows you how many of your dreams you have accomplished, despite any shortcomings, and if not dreams, then how many positive things you have done in your life and what you have yet to do. For me that would include being an inspiration to others, curing Cory and myself and then helping others, teaching about health, living a life in synch. with simple living and healthy lifestyle, increasing my fitness level, getting involved with immigrants again, doing japanese homestays again, opening my house up to travelers again, landlording again, learning spanish and japanese, learning healthy and delicious recipes, building a cob oven and wall outside, learning about permaculture, meeting many new like-minded people, biking more again, visiting the OUR ecovillage in Shawnigan for a workshop, doing a cob workshop, doing a raw food workshop, continue to find dimes that inspire me beyond words, give more and want less, staying true to my values of minimalism and no unnecessary consumption, love unconditionally...SO many things, always changing, being completed, so exciting. Life should NEVER be boring. Even the most mundane tasks of homemaking are never a bore with children around. I am so grateful to God for all this year, and my life as a whole, has taught me and am SO excited about the year to come.